Trepidation

And then I am fascinated with the story behind the idea of Charles Bukowski quoting , “I have got to decide- Kill myself or love myself.” Does wishing to know his sorrow, anger , disappointment , hopeless and overwhelming response to the question of what you should be doing makes me crazier than him? I guess not or Maybe It does. I honestly don’t know who he is yet or why is he popping in my mind just now when all I was trying to do was immerse myself in the imaginary green light of nature , thinking of Tara and meditating . I know Universe works in a strange manner. How strange? You ask me ? Well not that I know of. I am not aware how it happens and I am not questioning it. Maybe because I am just irrationally afraid of the answer. But wait, Stick by me , in few months I might reveal how it is working in the back end , trying to make my life a little easy , it’s not tough but not ideally as I would have preferred it. Do you feel in the same manner? Lucky for you if not ! But if you do, hey, come and meet me. Let’s talk about the hidden motifs we can find in our situation and maybe we can grade how the driver of the train of our life is performing. But hey! seriously tell me , does it all actually fall in place as we all say?